<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>the road ahead by dndfanficjustwannapost</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29110596">the road ahead</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dndfanficjustwannapost/pseuds/dndfanficjustwannapost'>dndfanficjustwannapost</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Original Work</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Denial of Feelings, Emotional Constipation, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 11:35:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,527</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29110596</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dndfanficjustwannapost/pseuds/dndfanficjustwannapost</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After complications in Lirindel, Altana and Luma decide to join the gang as they travel on their quest to find and defeat Baroch.<br/>Inumerous complications end up leading them somewhere else.<br/>Liara doesn't take that well.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Altara, law - Relationship</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>If the map is anyting to go by, they shouldn't be far from the nearest city.</p><p>Luma has cooked for them, cleaned and seasoned the carcass of some animal Altara brought back to the camp, with condiments she got from God-knows-where, and now they are all chatting, hurdled together around the campfire, blabbering and laughing and splurting non sense non stop. Liara observes her teammates, rotating the piece of meat around her fingers, awfully quiet.</p><p>She knows how stupid it is to be strung up about a mere village, especially about one that can't hold a candle to the most modest cities she has seen until now. It's childish, pathetic; but it's there. The weariness, the uneasiness, along with the metaphorical hole on her chest that only ever expands. It's all back. And if Liara is being honest with herself, she now realizes they never actually left.</p><p>It's a bit sickening, but at same time it's familiar, and it makes her heart ache with nostalgia for something that she doesn't really miss.</p><p>Liara remembers it well, feels it vividly. Deep down, she still feels like that girl she tried to leave behind, way too inadequate to fit anywhere, too abhorrent to ever be wanted. Still too mistrustful to ever truly rely on anyone.</p><p>Shoving the last piece of her portion inside her mouth, she slides away, gluing her back to a tree trunk she is lucky to find and staying there until everyone decides to go to sleep. It takes hours, but with a knife in hand, she draws and erases small patterns on the ground, and that proves to be a decent distraction. When she is sure they are all asleep, Liara lightens a torch and marches on her own, strolling along a path she knows way too well. It doesn't take that long for her to get to her old spot and, like the girl she once was, she laughs at nothing, sad and tired, but still very much excited to explore the ruins of her little fortress.</p><p>"What do you think you are doing?" and just like that, her smile drops. Liara turns around abruptly, ready to defend both herself and the small wooden house a few steps away from them.</p><p>"What are <em>you</em> doing here?"</p><p>Altana comes closer. There's curiosity in her eyes, but there's also annoyance. She sighs.</p><p>"You shouldn't be walking around this time, specially considering your tendency to get lost and attract dangerous entities," the last part is said with an extra amount of venom in her tone, as if the condescence of her words wasn't more than enough.</p><p>Liara narrows her eyes, answering without thinking.</p><p>"I don't do that."</p><p>Altana opens a sardonic smile, her lips stretching as her carmine eyes gleam with something akin to mockery. That's when Liara knows she made mistake. </p><p>"Is that why you ended up in the middle of a dangerous forest with a galarlig entering your hand, then?"</p><p>Taking a few steps back, it's her turn give a smile of her own. It's a tired one, a bit too firm and stretched out to be genuine, but it conveys the message well enough.</p><p>"I wasn't lost," she lies, cocking her head to emphazise her point "I went after the galarlig myself. I do admit it was due to carelessness that it got on my hand, but I won't repeat the same mistake again. There's no need to worry, you can go back now." </p><p>There's something extremely pleasant about watching Altana's face crack, and Liara relishes in it, pressing her lips together to avoid showing her amusement. </p><p>"I'm not after a lecture. Just... could you go back to the camp? I won't cause any trouble. <em>Specially</em> on an area I know so well" she says, taking a few steps on the building's direction without turning away from the insistent woman. </p><p>Only when Altana is about to speak, Liara decides to present her with her back and resumes her walk. As entertaining as Altana can be, she's not in the mood for bickering. Carefully, almost fondly, she approaches the fortress, crouching down to touch what used to be the door with a stretched palm. Very slowly, as if afraid any kind of pressure could break it, she pulls it away and lowers her head even more, planting a strong hand on the ground and pulling herself inside with her elbows.</p><p>It's just like she remembered. The house itself may be no more than a few planks of wood clusmily nailed together, but it's not as small as it looks from the outside, nor as empty. There's a small table on the corner with two stools, a worn out doll laying on top of one. Near the entrance she just crawled through Liara sees three cushions, and as her eyes wander she starts seeing more and more of her old books and toys — most of them either given to her by Mira or Adelaide or found in the trash. The drawing they all made on wall opposite from her is still there, dully and faded, almost falling to pieces, but it's still clear it's a tree.</p><p>The structure trembles a little bit and Liara is reminded of Altana, who is then following her inside with a look of revulsion on her face.</p><p>How annoying. Her reasons for staying are understandable, but couldn't Altana give her at least a bit of privacy?</p><p>"Why don't you wait outside? I'm almost done here."</p><p>The question seems to fall on deaf ears, and Liara holds back a grunt. Altana makes herself comfortable, or tries, considering how little space they have now that there are two people instead of one. She settles herself on Liara's side, too far for any of their limbs to touch, but still closer than necessary. Liara tries not to read too much into that.</p><p>"What is this place?"</p><p>"An abandoned playground" she answers, wearily, trying to find any kind of malice in Altana's face. But it's hard to tell if she manages to find anything there. "I... used to come here when I was a kid."</p><p>"Is this why you are visiting it in the middle of the night?" she asks. Her eyes look even more intense illuminated by the faint light of the torch. The shadows play on her face, bringing out all of its sharpness, marking her high cheekbones and enhancing her jawline as it moves with each word. It makes her look more intimidating than usual, but also terribly beautiful.</p><p>"Not exactly."</p><p>Liara backs away, trying to find some space for herself. Gingerly, she passes her arms over Altana's legs, only for her own legs to follow suit. She drags herself to the drawing on the wall, looking for an excuse to create distance between herself and the other woman as her heart finally begins to slow down. Seating herself in front of the tree, her hands tatter the ground, looking for the spot.</p><p>It's hard to ignore the sensation of being watched, but she tries to, digging her fingers on the soil and pulling them back until the unmistakable shape of a chest starts to appear. As soon as she sees it, Liara shakes the dirt from her hands and shoves them back inside the hole forcefully, opening it up, trying to enlargen it in order to find the edges of the chest.</p><p>With some effort, she finds them, and after a bit more of digging she is pulling the out the wooden box, her feet firmly planted on the ground and her hands bruising from the blunt force of the action. </p><p>The impact makes her fall back, but she brings the chest down with her, landing ungracefully on the ground as it drops on her lap. A rough laugh leaves her lips, and Liara pulls the lid open without any ceremony. Her smile twitches a bit when she feels someone approaching, and she is reminded of Altana's presence. It doesn't surprise her when a pair of legs arrange themselves efficiently half on her side, half behind her. Altana's movements are calculated, accurate, but still nonchalant, as if she is barely making an effort. Liara wishes she knew how to do that.</p><p>"So this is why you came here," she says. It's hard to tell whether it's a question or an affirmation, but Liara nods.</p><p>She can't help talking back.</p><p>"You solved the mystery," she says, holding herself back not to say more, to avoid letting slip something that might potentially get her killed. </p><p>"Looks like I did" comes her voice, a bit grumpier than before.</p><p>Since Altana got closer, Liara finds herself trapped where she is. Going back to her old position would be an option if she was willing to go over Altana's legs again, but prefers to avoid doing that. And besides, if she covers the hole she digged with enough care, she can still find a good space there. The light of the torch barely reaches it, as Altana is blocking it, but Liara is not one to make demands.</p><p>It's dimly lit, but that will have to do.</p><p>Silent or not, Liara knows she is being observed, and since they are travelling together, trying to get on Altana's good side doesn't seem to be a bad idea.</p><p>"This is something I dug here when I was a kid," she explains, giving a few taps to the hole she just filled and pressing her back against the wall. "I was supposed to have dug it out a long time ago, but..." she shifts uncomfortably "I... didn't."</p><p>"Any reason for that?" </p><p>Liara looks up, seeing that she hasn't gotten any closer. </p><p>"I'm not a fan of this place."</p><p>Altana seems to consider her words for a little longer, which Liara thinks is a first, but before she can say whatever she is thinking of, her eyes land on the open box.</p><p>"Anything special inside?" she asks, closing some of the distance between them to take look inside.</p><p>She reaches out to touch a small notebook and Liara grabs it out of her hands before anything can truly be seem. That annoyed and arrogant look of hers greets Liara she takes her eyes off the journal she just retrieved, and it is a bit irritating, but it's also bothersome in other ways that have nothing to do with anger.</p><p>"It's my diary."</p><p>The disapproval partially morphs into something else. It's far from pleased or non threatening , but it's also far more relaxed and way more like what Liara usually sees of her. It's not exactly mockery, but not as friendly as teasing. She doesn't say anything this time, seeming to wait for Liara's next actions.</p><p>Ignoring the sharp look that never truly seems to leave Altana's face, she shoves the diary on her backpack and delves into the box, making use of the brief moment the light comes through, getting to her with far more strength than she was counting on. Liara doesn't have to look up to know Altana has moved. She doesn't have the time to do so, regardless of intent, as a pale hand joins her own in the box, grabbing a book with too much precision for someone who shouldn't be able to see inside the chest. </p><p>"This is-" <em>mine</em>, she is about to say.</p><p>"A magic book."</p><p>Liara is the one to get closer, forgetting the nervousness as soon as magic is mentioned.</p><p>"It's something someone left to me... when she died," she says, letting Altana go through the pages. "It's empty."</p><p>There's a shift, and she almost doesn't see the smirk as the light dims again.</p><p>"It's not. But this," she closes the book and rests her finger on a geometric drawing on the corner of the hardcover "won't let itself reveal its to us,not on a whim. You have to deserve it."</p><p>With a frown, Liara reaches for it, expecting Altana too give it back, but she doesn't move an inch. Apparently, she is not done looking.</p><p>There's a moment of doubt in Liara's mind. She imagines if Altana would ever agree on giving it back, and as much as she tries to find arguments to oppose the thought, the only one she finds is her lack of magic ability. Since the conflict in Lirindel, Altana has gone back to what she was before in terms of power. Her body, on the other hand, is very clearly not the same, having grown even paler and thinnier in a suspiciously short amount of time. Her cheeks were more hollow too, and that light on her eyes was still there, but it was no more than an excuse of what Liara had once seen. She wouldn't dare to say that outoud, but Altana looked sick.</p><p>"I'm not stealing your book, if that's what you are wondering."</p><p>"I didn't think you were," she lies.</p><p>Altana raises an eyebrow, giving that dry smile of hers as the tip of her finger hits an specific page. One that... doesn't seem to be empty.</p><p>Before she even know what she is doing, Liara reaches out for the book again, only to be stopped by a vexed glare coming from her companion. She retreats, showing a scowl of her own. Even though they are close, Altana is hovering over the book, and there's not enough luminosity for Liara to see what is written.</p><p>"What does it say?" she asks, still cross.</p><p>"It's a simple spell, very basic." Altana says slowly, looking at the sorceress herself instead of checking the text. Liara wonders if she's being judged. She probably is. "It allows you to gain the service of a spirit that takes a animal shape of your choosing. The spirit can fight for you as regular pet, but if you need touch to cast a spell, it can also do so, even from a certain distance."</p><p>Liara doesn't look away from her, too enrolled by the information to consider it. She thinks about trying to take the book back one more time, but it's useless. She will have to wait for Altana to grace her with her good will, if she has any.</p><p>"Is there a problem with that city?" </p><p>The sudden change of topic makes her back away. They may be way too close for her to try her luck with lies, but that doesn't mean she can't still avoid the question. </p><p>"What makes you think I have any?"</p><p>Altana laughs, closing the book with more force than necessary.</p><p>"Only a fool wouldn't see it," she says. The words don't match her tone, low and curious... maybe even gentle. Or maybe that's just her way of getting the truth out of someone. Liara will never know. "And I'm not only the only one wondering."</p><p>She sighs, looking at Altana in defeat.</p><p>"I grew up here."</p><p>"Are your parents still-"</p><p>"No," the woman looks annoyed by the interruption, and it prompts Liara to keep going. "I don't have... <em>never</em> had any."</p><p>Spilling personal details of her life to a stranger, in the middle of the night, shouldn't sound as appealing as it does now. But it does feel good to finally be able to say it ouloud, and one of the things Liara likes about Altana is that she won't tear up or try to give her a hug, she won't pity her, won't make her feel like the poor orphan girl telling a sob story. Even now, Liara feels just like herself, talking about unfortunate events she was unlucky enough to have had thrown on her way.</p><p>And that means she wants to keep talking.</p><p>"I grew up in an orphanage."</p><p>"I suppose you were not adopted, then."</p><p>It's hard to keep the bitter smile out of her face. Liara avoids looking at Altana, knowing her emotions are written just right there, out in the open for her to see, and that makes her feel so... exposed. So stupid for letting that happen. For not being stoic and strong and <em>over</em> something that happenned so many years ago. </p><p>"I think I've told you that my magic used to be out of control, " she says, as if she doesn't remember their talk, waiting for Altana's to either deny or confirm the fact before saying anything else. </p><p>"You did," she looks interested, but Liara is almost sure Altana knows where it's going. </p><p>"Well... no one would adopt a kid who sets everything on fire."</p><p>Something on Altana face changes, and Liara thinks she sees a quick glimpse of empathy there. </p><p>"Magic can be a tricky thing," she says slowly, almost solemnly "and it can cost a high price, you and I know that from experience. But it can bring certain things that are hard to let go of." Liara realizes once more how close they are, but she doesn't pull away, Altana does. "Would you have given up on your magic if it meant that things would've been different?"</p><p>She doesn't know. Would she? </p><p>There were many hurtful things about her childhood, things that only existed because of magic; but Liara can't really imagine herself giving that up. She felt so powerful when she sent her first voluntary wave of fire, when she cast her first protection spell. That staff on her back made her feel like a god. Having all that power at your reach, literally on your hands, is so... intense. She can't stop craving for more.</p><p>"If I were wiser, I think I'd say yes, but... no, I wouldn't."</p><p>There's a quirk on the corner of Altana's lips and the way she looks seems almost pleased, as if that was the answer she was expecting. Liara responds with a small smile of her own, one that barely lasts as she extends her hand.</p><p>"The book?"</p><p>Altana lays it on her hand, not breaking eye contact.</p><p>"Is there anything else you intend to do here?"</p><p>"...no?"</p><p>"Let's go, then." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. test 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>If the map is anyting to go by, they shouldn't be far from the nearest city.</p><p>Luma has cooked for them, cleaned and seasoned the carcass of some animal Altara brought back to the camp with condiments she got from God-knows-where, and now they are all sitting together, hurdled around the campfire, blabbering and laughing and splurting nonsense nonstop. Liara observes them, rotating the piece of meat around her fingers, awfully quiet.</p><p>She knows how stupid it is to be strung up about a mere village, especially about one that can barely hold a candle even to the most modest cities she has seen until now. It's childish, pathetic; but it's there. The weariness and the uneasiness she used to feel are both back, and so is the metaphorical hole on her chest that only ever expands. If Liara is being honest with herself, she now realizes they never truly left.</p><p>It's a bit sickening, but there’s also familiarity, and it makes her heart ache with nostalgia for something that she doesn't really miss.</p><p>It’s impossible not to remember, not to feel dread as they approach. Deep down, she still feels like that girl she tried to leave behind, way too inadequate to fit anywhere, too abhorrent to ever be wanted. Still too mistrustful to ever rely on anyone.</p><p>Shoving the last piece of her portion inside her mouth, she slides away, gluing her back to a tree trunk she is lucky to find and staying there until everyone decides to go to sleep. It takes hours, but with a knife in hand, she draws and erases small patterns on the ground and that proves to be a decent distraction. When she is sure they are all asleep, Liara lightens a torch and marches on her own, strolling along a path she knows way too well. It doesn't take that long for her to get to her play house and, like the girl she once was, she lets out a snigger. She might be sad and tired, but she’s still very much excited to explore the ruins of her little fortress.</p><p>"What do you think you are doing?"</p><p>Just like that, her smile drops and she hastly turns around, eyeing the newcomer in alarm.</p><p>"What are you doing here?"</p><p>Altana comes closer, avoiding stepping on the stones near her feet without dignifying a single look to the ground. She is not carrying a torch either, or anything that could help light up the path, but that shouldn’t be surprisng. There's a flash of curiosity in her eyes, but there's also annoyance. She sighs.</p><p>"You shouldn't be walking around this time, specially considering your tendency to get lost," the last part is said with an unexpected strain in her tone, as if the condescence of her words wasn't more than enough.</p><p>Liara narrows her eyes, and the answer is out before she has fully processed what she wants to say.</p><p>"I don't tend to do that."</p><p>Altana opens a sardonic smile, her lips stretching as her carmine eyes gleam with something akin to mockery. That's when Liara knows she made mistake.</p><p>"Is that why you ended up in the middle of a dangerous forest with a galarlig entering your hand, then?"</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>